Gear Head: Maryland's Pride Uniforms

Maryland and Under Armor are debuting the newest version of the Terps "Pride" costumes this week.  

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Let's never forget what Maryland did to us in 2011.  

We lost a lot of good men that night these abominations debuted. I think of them often.  

When word got out that Maryland was going to do this again I contacted Federal authorities on a tip line to try and get the Under Armor plant raided or perhaps have an injunction filed against either UM or the apparel company to stop it. I have failed you. Worse yet, your government has failed you.  

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This is what the Terps will be trotting out this year.

A Shocking Confession

Now I now many of our gear head regulars tune in for the vitriol and stay for the hate. Sadly for you I have neither. I actually don't mind these.

Perhaps it was 2011's awfulness, perhaps I'm suffering from odd case of Stockholm Syndrome, but these aren't as terrible as we all feared. Sure there are terrible elements, elements that are repeated throughout Under Armor's catalog, but they get closer to working than not.

The idea appears to be to focus on Pride in the state of Maryland, of course also to sell an ass load of Under Armor stuff.  

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Check the Helmet Ladies...

The biggest upgrade in this version of the Pride outfit is the helmet. Hand painted and shockingly subtle for being so loud. Just look at the picture from 2011 and remember it could always be worse.  

I assume that's a tortois design with the rings. So whatever. The Maryland on the back looks pretty cool if you're into that sort of thing, which I'm not saying whether I am or not, just saying.  

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Now There are Flaws

Now, as we chronicled here, the pants are an issue. The mid thigh stripe with "Maryland" on it, otherwise glossed, the holster is a steaming pile of crap.

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The Glove Doesn't Fit

Lastly, can we please stop with the glove designs? How about we compromise and move that design to the seat of the pants so that in intense, stressful, "clinching" moments we could see how intense things were really getting. Or, even better assign everyone a buddy who has the other half of their mark and make them connect in order to make the design. BETTER STILL, just stop it.  

For anyone who still cares, here's the video of the painting of the helmet. This appears to be where were going. At least it's not a GIANT waste of time or money. Right? 

Posted on September 20, 2013 and filed under Sports, Southwest Round-Up.