It's week ten, we're can see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's a natural light, something you haven't seen since late August. Doctors say your body needs exposure to natural light on occasion. They're liars. Shut the blinds and prep for week ten!
All times Texas.
Navy vs. Notre Dame (Jacksonville) 10:30 am CBS
Brian Kelly got the dreaded vote of confidence from his AD last week.
Pack your shit Brian, they're coming for you. Chances are, if you lose to the Midshipmen on Saturday, they'll have your office packed up before you get back from Orlando.
Not that they're not justified, it takes real coaching deficiencies to turn a roster full of 4 and 5 star All-Americans into a 3-5 product. Brian should be proud in a, "hey I just set that on fire" sorta way.
Air Force at Army 11:00 am CBSSN
'Merica will be on full display as Air Force travels to West Point for a Commander and Chiefs Showdown! Do your civic duty and tune in. Stand for the pledge. Wear pants.
Texas at Texas Tech 11:00 am FS1
Longhorns and Red Raiders squaring off live on FS1 with a combined 8-8 record! Who's gonna get the win and slip just above mediocrity? Tune in to find out!
Charlie Strong beat Baylor on Saturday and there's a sliver of light in the old losing his job cavern. He's like those Chilean miners except just picture Matthew McConaughey lowering himself down and reaching out his manicured hand out for Charlie's.
Texas A&M at Mississippi State 11:00 am SEC Network
The old Ags are ranked 4th in the college football playoff rankings. Everyone, and we mean EVERYONE has an opinion on A&M's high ranking. It's almost as though it's a contrived system to create interest in a Tuesday night made for TV event on ESPN. We may have already said too much.
Dan Mullen might try to sneak on the A&M bus back to College Station in a last ditch crackpot effort to escape Mississippi.
BYU at Cincinnati 2:30 pm CBSSN
We really don't care about this game but would just like to point out how close we all were to this game being an actual Big 12 sanctioned event.
Florida at Arkansas 2:30 pm CBS
The SEC sucks in 2016. Here are exhibits A and B. Florida is THIS close to qualifying for a second straight SEC title game drubbing.
Arkansas continues to receive top 25 votes for reasons that we can only attribute to their alphabetical placement.
Oklahoma State at Kansas State 2:30 pm ABC
The Mullet vs. Wizard Bill Snyder. Color us excited.
Oklahoma State is one week removed from killing the Big 12's playoff chances and now they control their destiny in the Big 12 race. Wizard Bill doesn't believe in destiny. He believes in a crisply pressed Alamo Bowl pullover and a pair of discontinued Nike shoes.
Wizard Bill has lived through worse hair styles so he won't be thrown by Gundy's Canadian Waterfall.
TCU at Baylor 2:30 pm FOX
Baptists vs. Christians 2016! Remember when this was the rivalry for the new Millennium? Now? Let's tap the breaks.
Whatever, we'll always have 2014.
This is Jim Grobe's first and likely only venture into the Holy War. He'll be taking your tickets at gate C prior to kick off and while Phil Bennett and Kendal Briles coach the team, Grobe will make balloon animals for the kids.
So if things keep going this way for TCU's offense where does Kenny Hill transfer next? He's the Mary Poppins of college quarterbacks, it's all fun and games when he first shows up, next thing you know you're 2-3 in conference and he's flying away holding on to his umbrella after tossing a pick six. It's a spoonful of something but we know it ain't sugar.
Iowa at Penn State 6:30 pm BTN
Last week a Pennsylvania jury awarded former Penn State coach Mike McQueary $7.3 million in a defamation suit against the university. That's a hefty number until you consider Kirk Ferentz makes $9.0 million every two years to take Iowa to the Taxslayer bowl.
Alabama at LSU 7:00 pm CBS
Our Hammer Fight is the annual sledge-hammer-a-thon between the Crimson Tide and Bayou Bengals. Nick Saban vs. Les Miles errrrrrrr Ed Yaw Yaw Orgeron. Tiger Stadium is going to be lit, both literally and figuratively.
This is Yaw Yaw's most important job interview. It's good this takes place on the field because Yaw Yaw typically ends his interviews by taking off his shirt and demanding someone fight him.
We may as well mention that some poor athletic director is mere months away from entrusting his program to Lane Kiffin. Oh, he's totally changed from the guy who abandoned Tennessee after one year and merited pulling off the team bus so he could be fired at USC.
We're giddy to watch the train wreck happen. Again.
Nebraska at Ohio State 7:00 pm ABC
Ohio State gets to deliver the fatal blow to Nebraska's playoff chances live on National TV. Then the sad part is, Nebraska can still win the Big 10 West be forced to travel to Indianapolis for an early December clubbing by either Ohio State again or a brand new clubbing by Michigan. Sounds like fun.
The Big 10 West should build a Great Wall of Indiana to keep the eastern horde from pillaging their quant little villages.