It's week two folks. What did we learn in week one? Masterminds aren't masters and sometimes lose their minds, never go head to head with a guy named Buckshot and college football is a four quarter game. We also learned that you could make an indention on your couch when you sit in one spot for twelve hours. You also learned that at some point the wife and kids, worried because you haven't moved, will check your pulse and possibly even attempt to revive you. Don't let them stop you. It's early days; everyone has a role. Yours is to consume college football; theirs is to keep you breathing so you can do so. On to week two.
All times Texas.
As always, Thursday and Friday are for Texas high school football. Get yourself out and support the youngsters.
Texas State at Colorado 1 p.m. PAC 12 Network
If you live somewhere between Sacramento and Burbank California you can watch this game live on the PAC 12 Network. That's the extent of their distribution. Well, if you have Direct TV forget about it, no reason to let fans watch games. That's silly.
The Mile High Hippies play the Texas equivalent in Texas State.
If you'd like an interesting read, check out what Colorado coach Mike MacIntyre DIDN'T DO when learned that one of his coaches was assaulting a girlfriend. Then think about how Colorado is paying MacIntyre over $5 million a year to be a leader of men. And put this cherry on top, the Regents at Colorado gave MacIntyre a raise days after an internal investigation found wrongdoing by MacIntyre in his handling of the situation.
San Jose State at Texas 2:30 Longhorn Network
Well, Tom Herman's opener went off like a fart in a space suit. The mastermind lost his opener and saw his team give up 51 points to boot. Despondent Longhorn fans threw objects onto the field in the response. If Texas loses to San Jose State, get out the pitch forks and torches.
Todd Orlando appears in midseason form already.
Texas DC Todd Orlando: "This ballgame is going to show everybody in the country if Texas has the grit to win a championship."— Brian Davis (@BDavisAAS) September 7, 2017
It's San Jose State Todd, USC is next week.
TCU at Arkansas 2:30 CBS Sports
The Frogs travel to Fayetteville to take on the Bielema and his Hogs. Both teams kicked the hell out of HBC teams last week, now they aim at each other.
The Fort Worth Star came out this week and claimed that TCU was carrying the flag for Texas after Texas, A&M, and Baylor crapped the bed. That's all we need, a 7 win flag bearer.
North Texas at SMU 6:00 WatchESPN
It's the BATTLE OF THE HIPPOGRIFF TROPHY! We won't go into our disappointment that the trophy still sits in the drawing room. We've given you a gift North Texas and SMU, a gift to take this contest to the next level, let's go there, together.
Nichols State at Texas A&M 6:00 ESPNU
How was your Sunday? Kevin Sumlin had a pretty nice one; his team blew a 34 point lead, he helped launch Josh Rosen's Heisman Campaign and became a national punch line. Oh and he might have cost himself his job.
The Colonels come to Aggieland where A&M will be breaking in a true freshman quarterback who isn't great at, you know, throwing the ball.
Tune in to Aggie football this year; it's gonna to get weird.
Rice at UTEP 7:00 CUSA.tv
The Owls traveled 26,000 miles to play Stanford, now they travel to El Paso to play UTEP. At least the food will be better.
Sean Kugler does not have a beard anymore. Yes, that's news. Bearded Sean Kugler would've never lost by 49 points to Oklahoma. I once saw Kugler's beard eat a steel girder for breakfast and crap out nails by lunch time.
The winner lives another day; the loser is relegated.
UTSA at Baylor 7:00 FSN
Speaking of poor opening weekends, Matt Rhule's was rotten. For all time the record books at Liberty shall reflect that Buckshot Calvert smote the Bears and there was much whoa in Waco when he and his golden arm ravaged the Baylor secondary. FCS teams shouldn't set records against FBS teams. They should take their paycheck and their ass whooping and go home.
The Roadrunners are preparing for Frank Wilson magical, incredible, rocket ride to a CUSA championship. If UTSA can beat Baylor, thousands of UTSA student, waiting to transfer to a different state school, will learn of the win as they commute to campus Monday morning.
Houston at Arizona 9:30 p.m. ESPNU
Major Applewhite's first game as the official head man in charge of the Cougar Dynasty got canceled, but like so many great things, the St. Louis Football Cardinals, the original Winnipeg Jets, and racist sheriffs, it will resurrect in Arizona.
Ed Oliver, Destroyer of Worlds, waits to be loosed.